I can’t say enough about the support that my husband, Richard, has given me on this journey through cancer and chemotherapy.

We have cancer

The first time I heard my husband say this, I was surprised. But since he started expressing that “we” have cancer to our friends, relatives, as well as to me, my husband has followed through with his commitment to face cancer with me as a participant. He has been by my side when I was hospitalized. He even stayed with me in the hospital until 2 a.m. when my fever finally broke. He has been with me for every chemo infusion and each surgical procedure. He has been with me for every bump and turn on the road.

It also seems like my husband has experienced a lot of the same symptoms as I have experienced. When I experienced “chemo brain” (the inability to process more than one thought at a time, and the quick loss of memory), he was experiencing it right along with me. When I was tired and could hardly keep my eyes open, he too experienced tiredness and wanted to lay down beside me. I don’t blame my husband for experiencing tiredness as he went through many sleepless nights with me when I was unable to sleep. When I tossed and turned in bed, he would make sure I was okay. When I experienced excruciating pain and kept waking up to find my Tylenol or nerve pills for the chemo-related nerve damage in my legs, or when I was scrounging for Tums for the pain in my stomach, he was looking out for me. If I moved, my husband woke up. I couldn’t even go to the bathroom without his concern that I was going to take off and pass out somewhere. We have gone through this trial together in every way possible!

Nourishing and cherishing in action

I can’t help but praise God for my husband and the way that he has been there for me during this heavy trial. Tomorrow, December 5, 2013, I go back to the hospital for the 6th out of 8th chemo treatments that are scheduled for me. This is the second treatment of the last four infusions that are considered the harshest part of my chemotherapy. I already know what to expect, and my doctor has told me that the nerve pain will not lessen even though he is only going to give me 3/4 of the dose of docetaxel tomorrow. He is very concerned that if he gives me the full dose, I will go back into grade 4 neutropenia and end up in the hospital with a serious systematic infection that could threaten my life.

If everything goes the way it did last time, I will end up flat on my back in bed for at least a week. As before, I will struggle to get past all of the side effects that linger so that I can start to function again. And through all of this my husband will serve me and love me, yes even nag me as he reminds me to take my pills and to drink lots of water. He will tell me to let things and go to bed when I try to get up and do too much. I am experiencing what it means for a husband to love his wife like his own body. I am being nourished and cherished in every way possible at this time that I am at my weakest.

Honor

I wanted to do a post to honor my husband for his incredible love. Richard tells me that he would be lost without me and he wants to do everything he can to help me to stay on this earth so that we can be together. I want that too. In honor of my husband Richard, I want to publicly state that he fulfills the injunction of Ephesians 5:25, 28-29. Richard, I love you SO much, my husband and best friend!

Ephesians 5:25, 28–29 (NASB)  25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her… 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church